A Friday gift (besides that it’s Friday)

So what’s better than a Friday? 

Well.  A Friday when you’d been mentally preparing yourself for a mad day and then you find out that you have the entire morning free … to do loads of other shit.  But that’s not the point. 

 What it means for me is that I can yoga myself at a reasonable hour (read 6am) and then pack my car and carry things about in preparation for a pop-up shop at Aquaonline (all without excessive preplanning and lack of sleep).  Oh yes.

And today has seen me viciously swiping my credit card machine.  I love the sound of till slips printing.

Lessons this week ?

  • I’m actually pretty socially awkward without alcoholic lubrication
  • I’m 30 really soon
  • Eka pada shirshasana will be the end of me
  • It’s not that I’m old fashioned, but I really do like to be chased.  Use it don’t use it
  • I remain obsessed with ceramics


  • I like men.  Much.  And it becomes more obvious the longer I remain single …

  • South Africa has some seriously amazing jewelry designers.  Skermunkil is way up there.


  •  I would very much like to wear Madewell every day


  •  Spring is a tease.  But I see it over there.  Yes I do.  Hello balmy good humour and happy times.


Coffee table pretty please

Right, my brain is melting.  I kid you not.  Too much work, and too many balls in the air.  I need a PA and I courier.

Erm, where was I?  Oh yes.  Frazzled.  And my poor blog gets left out in the cold.  Much like my cat who is giving me the cold kitty shoulder as I’ve been too busy to devote all my free time to stroking him.

My house is looking lovely, after I painted some plastic animals and plastic army dudes neon pink (I will post pics…).  But I really need a new coffee table.  And it has to be one that is big enough and low enough to handle an impromtu informal snacking vibe.  I have my eye on one from Modernist (ok, I have my eye on many things from Modernist, but I’m being restrained).  Who’s up for making my day?

On another note:

Blog (via Urban Dictionary

To spew uncontrollably from one’s brain; involuntary and unstoppable release of thoughts onto electronic media.

“Dude. I totally just blogged all over that web page.”
“When I read about what happened last night, it made me blog all over my website.”
“I thought that chick was so hot that I had to blog as soon as I got home”


It’s not like I’m particularly precious about my personal space, but I do have my limits.  Today I took myself off to the GP due to a suspected bladder infection.  Tests returned inconclusive.  So my doctor decided that the next logical step was to give me an internal examination.  JAYSUS.  When I go to the gynae I mentally prepare myself for the probing around and indignity.  This came out of the blue!

I shit you not – she used her entire hand and had a good feel around.  What freaked me out completely though was the ovary squeezing and uterus poking.  Bloody hell, I had NO idea the baby-making bits were so accessible!   

I feel like I need a debriefing.  I’m thoroughly traumatised … although I guess the silver lining is that everything is in order!  God help me though when I do have a baby in my womb!

It’s all good

Sheesh I’m feeling weird today.  Comes from a public holiday mid-week I guess, and the fact that my heart/head situation is not really that balanced right about now (along with feeling dishevelled in the body department).

Click to make everything ok.  A little easier than the make-everything-ok pill (those buggers are just false advertising)


Woman’s Day

YAY for breasts and vaginas.

Today is a public holiday, which makes tomorrow feel like a Monday, when in fact it’s a Wednesday, and that makes it a three day week.  Yes.

I very much like being a woman.  Yes indeed.  And since we can do anything men can do, I’m hard-pressed to find anything lacking in my life due to my oestrogen levels.  But if I was a man for a day I’d:

  • get a lot of blowjobs (probably from men and women … for comparative purposes)
  • do a whole bunch of strength based yoga postures which currently piss me off in my slightly less muscled feminine state
  • adjust my balls in public … a lot
  • shave my face just to see what the fuss is all about
  • sleep with a couple of girls and see if sex really is different for a man (i.e. is sex really just sex?)
  • tease my friends and call them abusive names, all in the name of affection and bonding
  • get into a fist fight (or at least a little chest pushing)
  • jerk off
  • count how many times I think about sex in a day
  • test out the lack of male toiletries scenario and how it feels not to wear make-up and not take an hour to get ready for a date
  • Call someone “bru” with a straight face (preferably in the free-weights section of the gym)
  • Indulge in a haircut that costs 10% of my usual snip.

And then the next day when I’m back to being female, I’d play with my boobs for a good few hours, have multiple orgasms and pout and blink to get some man to buy me a drink.  Because that’s all we women do. 

Viva vagina!

Jen xx

no oppikoppi

Last week was a quiet blogging week.  In fact that was the only part of the week that was quiet, with the rest being packed with work, yoga and antihistamines.  But it was a good week too … I feel best when I am busy, productive and participating in the economic climate.

Here’s what I learnt this weekend:

  • Spring has poked its head out of winter’s duvet … soft, lime baby leaves and new shoots are appearing.  It’s my favourite time of year.  And added to that, the swallows will be back soon.  Happiness.
  • The busier I am the more time I have and the more energy I have to do stuff.  It may not be that way for extended periods of time, but patches of frenetic work between consistently busy is seriously motivating.
  • Human beings are insecure.  Even the ones you think are robustly self confident: there’s always someone’s opinion they value, the person who has the capacity to make them question their worth.
  • Tell people you value them and that you love them. It’s not always easy to say … but it’s always good to hear 🙂
  • There are some ex-boyfriends that you phone and there is still a connection, a missing,  a longing, and there are those who you speak to and there is … nothing.  Nothing but sadness and memories of the way things once were.  In both cases it’s best to make a cup of tea … and paint your nails instead.
  • Contrary to popular opinion I have body issues, and this week was one where my body love was tested … by cellulite.  Seriously, what is it all about?  I feel a little defeated.
  • There’s a sailor on my mind.  This telepathy thing is harder than I thought