A&P

There’s nothing like a weekend of anatomy and physiology to make you appreciate the human body.  It’s a startlingly complex system and it’s amazing that that vast proportion of the body’s processes work pretty much perfectly in so much of the population.  A little page turning in an anatomy and physiology textbook is enough to get you over your cellulite (just about).

What a week!  Female hormones cannot be underestimated, especially those caused by the body readjusting itself after a good 10 years of being on The Pill.  It’s been messy, to say the least, and I’m not sure the next few months are going to be any better.  Here’s what I learnt (in between the crying):

  • I prefer aggressive to passive aggressive
  • I am a freelancer and have my own businesses for very good reasons, many of which relate to being unable to tolerate micromanagement by control freaks and office politics
  • I’m good and proper tired.  I managed to relish in eustress for a good while, but now I’ve hit distress
  • I’m about to embark on a little dietary experiment – I want to cut out all processed goodies and sugar and stimulants, and see what happens to my practice and my mood.  I’m loath to begin the  process though – I know it’s not going to be too much fun – but hopefully the benefits will reveal themselves asap
  • I have a brand new business idea buzzing around my head and I’m getting excited – this might be just the thing to tie everything together (and it’s awesome that it all feels like it’s coming together as I approach 30!)
  • The need for physical contact cannot be underestimated
  • I love this exhibition: HORSE.  It’s the stomping hooves, chomping jaws, soft muzzles, liquid eyes, twitching muscles, flicking tails, hot breath and clip-clop of horse shoes on tar roads that I miss
  • It’s only when people are real, in all their vulnerability and insecurity and fear, that we feel like we really know and love them.  And it’s only when we are real with other people, even if we worry that they’ll think less of us or that we’ll be ‘too much’ or ‘too exposed’ that we become fully present and real ourselves
  • My practice is my number one priority
  • Craniosacral therapy is so very odd – I hate that I’m not “good” at it, that it works almost fully in metaphors that I don’t really get it just yet – CST is based to some extent in medicine and the body’s physical structures, but also so much of it is allegorical, layered, bizarre and inexplicable, while at the same time being sometimes tangible and revealing real results.  It’s straight weird! 

Namaste

Jen

Dirty thirties

Hello October. And that means that it’s almost November, my birthday month,  and since this year is the year I turn 30, I will be celebrating even more than the usual month-long festivities.

Anthropologie is one of my very favourite online destinations.  Birthday elf, go shopping!

Jen x

Weekend recap

I’ve outdone myself this year.  And now my body is outdone.  A couple of months with Olivier, travelling Ashtanga teacher, and I feel like I need a long moment on my bed.  Ahimsa may need to be reevaluated.

My week/weekend (despite lack of sleep) was a very cool one. Here’s a recap:

  • There’s such a thing as too much yoga
  • Teaching kids makes me happy (although I’m still feeling stressed about being “fun enough”)
  • It’s almost time for my 30th birthday and although I’m feeling freaked out about aging, I’m also relieved that this year has been one where so many things have come together (and apart) for me.  Finally I’m able to balance happiness and sadness, and feel deep-down that my days are filled with the ‘right’ things and people
  • The desire to leave SA is still strong, but I’ve come to realise that I enjoy the depth of relationships I have when I’m at home – I’m not really a skipping along the surface kind of person
  • There’s a tension in the air at the moment – not necessarily a bad one, just a stretched feeling, as though everyone is being pushed into discomfort.  Without a doubt this year people are having to deal with their shit
  • Coldplay push my melancholy button in just the right way

    We're at Coldplay!

  • A musician on stage is an irresistible aphrodisiac
  • Everyday I become more aware of the many layered nature of yoga – the benefits are immediate, but the deeper layers of the practice take years to reveal themselves, possibly because it takes years to become aware of the subtleties
  • Once is a mistake, twice is a choice
  • Next year is the year I buy a horse

Jen x

Retreating

My blog has been severely neglected in the last few weeks – a life in hyperdrive! Two weeks ago I was in Mozambique for a week’s yoga retreat with Ekam. It was simply awesome. Here’s what I learnt:

  • Tofo hasn’t changed that much in 8 years (which is great, considering the influx of tourists and the nasty neglectful attitude of most humans)
  • Flying to Inhambane is a wonderful experience – 3 hours later and you’re there
  • I life running a little backpackers in Mozambique is a truly appealing thought
  • Beer in Mozambique is delicious (after a day on the beach especially)
  • There are amazing people in the world
  • Matapa (a spinach/coconut milk mix) is delectable
  • South Africans have some entertaining things to say
  • Heartbreak and its effects cannot be underrated
  • I can sometimes be a little reckless and attach too much meaning to coincidence and connection
  • I’m a flirt (this one I’m still grappling with)
  • Sustained concentration during practice is a tough one for me (don’t even get me started on meditation)
  • Judgmental, egotistical attitudes pervade the more enlightened and those living fearfully in a box
  • Backbends remain my much loved nemesis (“heart open, heart open!”)
  • Timing, timing, timing
  • Joy is the middle point between comfort and discomfort 
  •  Choosing the unavailable is sometimes a way of keeping vulnerability at bay
  • Men who love dogs and kids are a potent sex appeal cocktail
  • Yoga has altered my body image drastically (for the better) but I can still feel incredibly awkward in my skin (there’s a disconnect between internal feeling and external appearance)
  • Talking a big talk is easy

Jen x